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Maybe Baby

I say maybe a lot. Maybe too much. I find myself second guessing almost every move I make, everything I say, and essentially, everything in my life. Before making a decision or doing something, I carefully plan out everything as much as I can. Then I take the leap. 

Why can’t I just dive in though? I wish I had the confidence to just jump headfirst into a pool, maybe not even head first, but that kiddish pencil style that they teach you. For God sake, it’s just a pool. I know what’s at the bottom, I can see right to it! But I can’t. And I won’t. It doesn’t matter how much I know or how much I could know once I do jump, I don’t have enough faith to just take that leap. 

Little leaps or big leaps, I never do anything without doubt. It’s been more than one occasion when someone asks me a yes or no question and I respond, “Yes. No. Maybe. I don’t know.” Simply intimidated by the simple question, I’m shaking in my boots and guess what, no answer. 

Maybe I’ll just be like Jim Carrey, and say yes all the time. I don’t know. 

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